What Are You Afraid Of?

While I was on my morning walk with my wife today we passed an older lady who was carrying what looked like a baton like the ones the girls twirl at a football game. Jokingly, I asked her if she was taking baton twirling lessons, but she said, “No, this is for self-defense!”

This astonished me because on this immediate block we were surrounded by two schools, four churches, and a retirement home. While an assault would not be impossible, it would be rare and certainly would be unlikely at 8 o’clock on a sunny morning. Bottom line, I think her fear was irrational.

I find that there are some fearful homebuyers too, especially those who are going through the process for the first time. Part of their fear is rational and I know how to cure it! It’s simply a matter of education. There are some good books about the process, mine among them. I know from e-mails that I get from my readers. Here’s a sample:

“I wanted to tell you that I loved your book . . . It was extremely helpful, especially as we prepare to purchase our first home. . . . Thanks so much . . . You are truly providing a value to people!”

The problem is that only about 5 percent of homebuyers buy any kind book about this process! It doesn’t mean that buyers can’t get information at industry websites, but surfing the web is not a substitute for really sitting down and studying.

Good agents have been involved in hundreds or perhaps thousands of transactions and they will help you with these issues, but I do not think that you should rely solely upon others to determine what you need to know. It is not that hard to understand the basics, but it isn’t going to get into you by osmosis. You do have to do some work. The good news is that it is well worth it. From a psychological standpoint you’ll gain confidence, and from a financial standpoint, you’ll save money.

The point of this whole exercise is that you 1) have a roadmap to anticipate what will happen in the process, 2) know when a decision has to be made, 2) make intelligent decisions.

What about other fears? I took a loan application from a client just last week, sent it to him with my book and a copy of my Retainer Agreement. That agreement has two purposes. First it is to establish the basis for a trusting relationship. Second, I want to find out if they are still shopping or if they really want to move forward with me and me only.

Anyway this client said

“I still have too much New Yorker left in me that this level of trust is simply not in my nature.” 

He is obviously fearful about whether I can be trusted. His fear is not without basis. You only have to talk with a few people who have bought homes recently to know that things CAN happen that are unexpected. With that in mind, I think that anyone interacting with the real estate sales and mortgage industries should have a heightened sense of awareness about the potential for duplicity.

What this gentleman should have said is, “I like what I see and I’m almost ready to commit myself to you, but I’d sure like to talk with some recent clients to see what they have to say about the results you got for them.” I would gladly have done so, and we’d have easily overcome his fear.

So when you start the process of finding reliable, experienced people to represent you, you have a right to ask a lot of questions about their abilities and track records. You have a right to get references, clients from deals they have concluded recently. You ought to call those clients and find out what they have to say. If you’re on the right track, your fears about that will vanish.

That’s just part of being careful!